Many of my “fans” have been asking me about foreign sales of my top mystery books. When I say many of them, I mean none of them, since I have no fans, unless one counts the voices that talk to me late in the evening. Yes … those screeching voices originating someplace upstairs in the dark, somber attic. I’m thinking they’re elves, perhaps even delightful Christmas elves, as opposed to, I don’t know, those pesky Labor Day elves with their annoying demands for higher wages, proper working conditions, and food.
Of course, the voices could belong to those unfortunate electrical contractors. I asked them to provide an estimate for the removal of some old wiring about a month ago. They went up to the attic and maybe they just never left. You see, it could be that my disgruntled dog locked the door on them and ate the key. However, in his defense, their estimate did run high. So, some form of punishment for them was absolutely justified, although last night my dog and I argued incessantly over whether a judge would agree. The electricians certainly had a strong opinion, but I don’t want to get into who’s right or who’s wrong or who’s responsible for buying those lazy freeloaders some food.
Now, during the time they’ve been my guests, they’ve expressed genuine interest in my foreign downloads, oh, let’s just say for last month. Well, I’m glad they asked. It broke down to The UK – 37% of the downloads, Australia – 26%, Canada – 24%, and Germany, India, Italy, Brazil, Spain, The Netherlands, and France combined – 13%. I had zero downloads in Mexico or Japan. All I can do is compliment those two nations on their good taste for my lack of popularity there. I don’t think I’m too popular up in the attic either.
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